Daylilies are among my favorite plants. A woman once asked me, “Is it true that daylily flowers only last for one day?" I replied that most daylily flowers actually fade before late afternoon on a hot day. She said, “Then why would anyone want to grow them?” Here’s my answer:
All things pass away. This may seem like a depressing thought. But it’s only depressing if you try to resist this fact of life. During my first few years as a gardener, I resisted the passing away of spring and summer. I spent most of the fall and winter moping around and longing for spring to come again. But then one year, for no apparent reason, I quit resisting the changing of the seasons. And my wintertime depression mysteriously vanished. Maybe it was simply because I was so busy filling seed orders that I didn’t have time to think about the past or the future. I’ve come to believe that the key to happiness and peace in this life is to live in the now. Regret for the past and fear (or hope) of the future causes depression and anxiety.
Since I got out of the habit of thinking that some future event, like the coming of spring, has the power to make me happy, it now seems funny to me when a fellow gardener says, “I can’t wait for spring!” I look out the window and wonder, “What’s wrong with this moment?” I can always find something beautiful to look at, even if it’s just the outline of bare branches against the sky. Sure, spring is nice, and I prefer to look at daffodils or roses, but those are just preferences on the level of form. In a way, I also feel sad when I look at a flower because I know it won’t last. But I can see a lovely sunset from my kitchen window every evening of the year, as long as I’m paying attention so that I don’t miss that brief and magical moment.
It doesn’t matter whether a daylily or any other flower lasts for a day, a week, or a month. All things pass away. Daylilies have taught me that now is the only time that I have. So I get up every morning during the daylily season and take a walk through the garden, pausing to admire each flower, because I know that it won’t last for long. Daylilies have taught me to quit procrastinating happiness.
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